February 29th was the last day of February. And to celebrate it being a special day because of the leap year, we got together with a group of about 20 seniors, because I work with seniors for my job, and we worked together to fold paper frogs, an origami party, folding frogs.

Because frogs leap, right? They jump. They leap, and it was a leap year. See how they go together. Leap year, frogs leap. So we folded origami frogs anyway, as we were all busy folding away. I suddenly found myself stuck. I was lost, completely lost, and no amount of folding this way or that way could get me back on track again.

I fell hopelessly behind and I learned a valuable lesson about getting help that I want to share with you today. So listen in and you'll find out what a paper frog can teach you about getting the help you need on the CELPIP exam or in English in general, for that matter. Sound good? Then please sit back, relax, and enjoy today's episode.

📍 Well, hello there and welcome to the Speak English Fearlessly podcast. This is the podcast from motivated English learners who want to speak English fearlessly and learn practical tips and strategies to conquer the CELPIP exam. I also love to feature encouraging interviews with regular people. People just like you.

We're working towards becoming fluent in English so we can learn from their experiences together. Who am I? My name is Aaron Nelson and I've been an English teacher for over 16 years, and I now help students prepare for the CELPIP exam through online classes. Have you ever folded paper before, like as an origami project? Have you ever tried to make an animal or a box or some sort of shape out of paper? First of all, I had never really done something like that before. Maybe I've done, you know, the odd hat or I've tried to do paper airplanes, but never.

Have I ever tried to fold something as complex as the frog we tried to learn how to do together on that day the way that we did it was following a YouTube video. Yeah. Following a YouTube video. So that means that most of us, there was like 20 of us in the room. We were all sitting around this big table while one person was up in front manning the computer and pausing and starting it again.

Starting it, and pausing it again step by step so we could follow along with them. And at first it was going really easily. The first few steps were just folding the paper in half and making a couple of other little folds. That part was easy. But then it quickly got very complicated, at least for me and my very uninitiated unpracticed folding fingers.

And no matter how fast I tried to fold, no matter how quickly I tried to do this and that with the pieces of paper, I couldn't keep up with the guy in the video. And before I knew it, I had fallen hopelessly behind. And thankfully the, the person who was running the computer backed up the video a couple of times because I wasn't the only one who was falling behind.

So we asked, Hey, could you back it up a little bit and play it from this part? So we backed it up and we did it again. We backed it up and we did it again. We backed it up and we did it like three or four times. And then I noticed that they were starting to get a bit impatient because, well, some of us were taking a bit too long.

So after the third time, they just said, you know what? We'll, we'll come back to you after. We just need to keep going so that everybody else can, can move along at the right speed. It wasn't done in an embarrassing way. I didn't feel embarrassed, and nor that anybody else that we were kind of behind a little bit because there was probably three or four of us who were kind of stuck.

So we just tried our best to go along with the flow. But like I said before, we were completely left behind. And in that moment there was a moment where I was looking down at my little, I don't think I could call it a frog, because it didn't look like a frog. It was more like a piece of paper folded in so many different directions that it, well, it was just a mess, actually.

But there was a moment when I looked up from my folding attempts and noticed everybody else, or most everybody else around me, moving along with the video folding this way and that keeping up and doing it properly, almost as if they had done this before. They were doing it right and I was doing it wrong, and I was one of the only ones except for my two or three other friends next to me who couldn't keep up.

And in that moment, I remembered instantly some of those times when I was in math class and felt like everybody else was getting the concept that my teacher was explaining on the board, like on the chalkboard. They were following along and I was the only one just having so much trouble trying to figure out this or that operation that I had to do.

Yeah, in the moment I felt like that and I turned to the ones next to me and I said, you know what? I'm having a flashback right now of being stuck in math class and not knowing what to do. And they laughed because they were all feeling the same thing left behind and unsure of what to do next. But thankfully I noticed something I noticed.

That there were some people who were almost next to me who were just sitting like three or four seats down who were a few steps ahead of us and were going along well. So we reached out to them. We decided that we would ask them for a little bit of help.

One of the ladies got up from what she was doing, came over and sat down next to me and she took her little paper frog and she unfolded it right to the point where I was, and she patiently began showing me step by step, fold by fold. What I needed to do to catch up.

And I especially appreciated and loved this lady for the way she helped.

She was so patient. There were a couple of steps where she was folding this way and that, and I couldn't, I just couldn't quite see how she was making the paper work, and so I. I lost her explanation a bit, and I, and I, and I just couldn't move forward again. And so I kinda looked at her with, with a, please help me kind of expression on my face, and she smiled and we had a good laugh over it.

And she went back and patiently explained the process to me again. She showed me one folding step at least three times. On the on the table next to mine with her fingers carefully maneuvering the paper in just the right way. And she was encouraging me to do the exact same thing. It was such a cool moment, and it was so cool that my mind took a picture of that, that she was so patient, so kind, and so willing to just unfold what she was doing to walk us through and walk me through the point, the parts that were missing.

And when we finally got to the end of it, she was so happy that she could have, that she could help us. We, we both came out of that, uh, my friends and I who were a little bit behind myself and the lady who stopped to help us, we were all happy that we got to learn from someone and she got to teach someone.

And what I especially liked about her approach to helping me. Was her attitude. She didn't have a, I'm better than you, or, I'm so much farther ahead than you. No, she, she came to help us with an attitude of, I'm in this with you and I'm going to walk with you until you get it. I really appreciated that from her.

Okay, so maybe you're thinking to yourself, this is a podcast about learning English and getting ready for the CELPIP exam, isn't it? I mean, I thought that's what I signed up for when I started listening to this podcast. What does folding paper frogs on a leap year day have to do with the CELPIP exam and learning English Well?

That's a great question, and I'm going to try my best to answer it because in my mind I thought that there was a great connection here that I wanted to share with you. But first, before we get into that connection, or maybe this is part of the connection, but I want to ask you something. I want to ask you to think about something

what does it mean for you? When you realize that you don't know what to do next, when you don't know the answer, or when you just don't know how to get unstuck, what does that mean for you? What kind of meaning do you attach to that moment? As I alluded to before, when I was a kid struggling in math class, the meaning I attached to my difficulty in learning was that I was just not good enough to learn math.

I felt ashamed and too stupid to ask for help. So I rarely did. I rarely asked for help because I just, I felt too embarrassed to, and you know what happened as a result? Nothing. I, I kept being stuck. The times that I did ask for help, I got it, but most oftentimes I remained silent and I didn't ask.

That's the question I'm asking of you today. What meaning do you attach. To that moment where you feel stuck and you don't know the answer, you feel like you, you're the only one who's not getting it. You're the only one who can't carry on a conversation with someone in English. You're the only one who keeps failing on the speaking section of the CELPIP exam.

Like maybe all of your friends have passed it and you're the only one who's not. What meaning do you put there when you realize I can't. I don't know what to do. I need help. What do you tell yourself about that?

What you tell yourself about that will determine if you ask for help or not. And asking for help can be the difference between you staying stuck and moving forward again, so I'll let you think about that. What meaning do you attach to being stuck and needing help? All right. Here are six things that I learned from my experience folding a paper frog and what it means to you.

Thing number one that I learned, I wasn't the only one stuck. I wasn't the only one stuck. My asking for help brought out others who needed it too. There were other people in that group of 20 who were also struggling.

Not everybody had it all together. Not everybody was succeeding easily with their frogs. Some of them. We're stuck and we're just not showing it. But guess what? When they saw us, our brave little group of people asking for help from our neighbors, they came over and started watching over our shoulders.

Once they realized they were getting, we were getting the help that they needed, they came over and started following along with us. Asking for help sometimes will help you realize that you're not the only one who's struggling. Number two, I asked for help from someone who is just a few steps ahead of me.

and they gladly stopped and helped me figure out where I was going wrong. They took the time to show me step by step how they were doing theirs and what I could do so that mine would look like theirs. You don't have to find someone who's a million years ahead of you.

You don't have to find someone who has mastered the CELPIP exam or who has mastered English to get help from. You can ask someone who maybe has six months or a year more of experience than you. You know what I'm saying? They don't have to have it all together to be able to help you. I've heard many stories of like people here living in Canada who are our friends, who they are grownups, but they have kids and their kids are going to English speaking schools.

But the parents, our friends, they are Spanish speakers. So when their kids come home from school, guess who needs to help with homework? The parents, right? The parents need the help out with the homework. But what if you don't know? What if you're not sure how to help? Well, I've heard some really cool stories of the kids actually helping the parents try to figure out English and, and learn together, and those kids are not like years and years ahead of the parents in many cases.

They're just a few steps farther ahead. So what I'm trying to say is that you don't need to find an expert to help you. Just look for someone who's just a little bit farther ahead than you. And who's willing to actually slow down and show you what they know that you are missing. Look for someone who has the heart of a teacher, like what my friend did for me.

That moment was so beautiful that I took a picture of it in my mind of the way she patiently opened up her frog and explained step-by-step what she did, that meant a lot to me. She has the heart of a teacher, and you need to find someone who has that heart, who's willing to go slow and unfold the experience for you.

And that's kind of like what point number three says that I want to share with you point number three, and I, I already kind of mentioned it, but uh, in the previous point, but point number three is that my helper was patient. Be careful about who you ask for help from. Be careful about who you ask for help from. Not everyone gives help in the same way.

Some people don't have a lot of patience. I'm sure you've met some of those people. I'm sure you have. I have. I know what it feels like to ask for help from someone who thinks that you should get it the first time they explain it and they get upset or they, ah. They roll their eyes, they get, they walk away sometimes because you're just not getting it.

So be careful who you ask for help from. Look for someone who has the heart of a teacher. Her attitude, and I said this before, but her attitude was, I'm with you. I'm not so far ahead of you that I forgot what it feels like to be trying to figure it out. I'm with you. Look for that kind of a person to ask for help from point number four to get help.

Sometimes you have to ask for it. Uh, that is a quote from a movie that my family and I watched last night called The Kid. And, uh, we have seen that movie a long, long time ago when it first came out. I think it was way back in the early two thousands. It's a Bruce Willis film where he's a busy. A successful business person, but he's driving himself so hard with his career.

He's working and traveling and doing this and doing that, and not stopping that. He's, he's like working himself so much that he's kind of suppressing who he really is. And in the movie he kind of meets. His, his inner child, you know, the, the kid that he used to be. And, and that kid kind of breaks out into his, into his real life and tries to help him to discover who he's supposed to be, not who he is right now.

It's a really good movie. If you, I, I recommend watching it if you, if you like those kinds of movies. It's got a nice ending to it and, uh, a really good message and it's just kind of fun to watch. But there's a quote in that movie where it says, to get help sometimes you have to ask for it. And the same thing is true with learning English and getting ready for the CELPIP exam and anything in life really.

If you don't ask for help, you're probably not going to find any, and you're going to stay stuck. Chances are you're going to stay stuck if you don't ask for help, or it will take you so much longer to figure it out on your own. Why not ask for help if you're feeling stuck with your English? If you're feeling stuck with your CELPIP prep?

Don't stay stuck. Ask for help. Look for someone that you can talk with and get the support that you need to get help. Sometimes you have to ask for it. Don't be afraid to ask for it. Number five, you have to realize and tell yourself that looking for help, needing help is not a sign of weakness or stupidity.

It's not. It's just a sign of being human. None of us are perfect. I know we tend to think of ourselves in that way, that I have to get it right the first time, and if I don't, I'm somehow a failure. But no. Needing help and needing to ask somebody to help you does not mean that you're weak. It means that you're a normal human being, but it also represents something, something powerful.

It represents an opportunity for you to learn and grow and to create a relationship with the person who helps you. Like what happened with that lady that came alongside of me and helped me? I mean, we were already pretty, we had a pretty good relationship. I worked with her all the time, but that kind of created a nice little bond between us.

The way that she was able to help me, the way I was able to learn, and the satisfaction that we both got out of that moment. That was something that we won't forget. That was a nice bonding experience, you know, and that can happen for you as you work with someone, but realize that it's not a sign of weakness.

If you need help, it's an opportunity for you to grow. Just like my paper folding experience, it was an opportunity for me to learn a new. I don't think I learned how to fold origami. Okay. But I definitely learned a thing or two about folding paper in certain ways to make it do certain things that I never thought paper could do.

So that became a learning opportunity for me that I never would've had if I didn't ask for help.

Finally, the last point that I wanna share with you is this. Who can you help? Who can you help? Did you know that you solidify what you've already learned when you teach it to someone else? One of the best ways that you can reinforce something that you've learned how to do, even if you've just learned it or are.

Still kind of learning it. One of the best ways that you can make it become stronger inside of you is by teaching it to someone else. You know what? You've already made a lot of progress with your English. If, for example, you're able to follow along with me on this podcast if you're, if you're tracking with me, if you're understanding what I'm sharing with you today.

Congratulations, my friend. You have made a lot of progress with your English. I mean, just remember way back when you first got started working with your language skills in English. I bet you you couldn't listen to a podcast like this. I bet you couldn't watch the TV and understand what was going on in the shows.

I bet you couldn't listen to the radio and understand what was happening. I bet it felt like the world around you, the English world around you, was this closed off place that you hadn't very little access to because you didn't understand what was going on. So today you're listening to this because I hope you're understanding what I'm saying.

And if that's the case, you've already made a huge amount of progress, which means you have things that you can teach to other people. You have things that you can teach to someone who is a few steps behind you. Like what my friend did with the paper folding. She hadn't finished her her frog yet, but she was like five or six steps ahead of us.

You can do the same thing for someone around you, and I promise you that it will improve your understanding of what it is you are trying to learn. Have you given that a try yet?

So to summarize, I just want to repeat again the six points that I shared with you that I learned from folding a paper frog because they apply to you. Number one, realize that if you're feeling stuck, you're probably not the only one. Asking for help will draw others out and you'll realize you're not alone.

Number two. Uh, look for someone to help you who's just a few steps ahead. They have a lot to teach you. Number three, make sure you look for someone who has the heart of a teacher, someone who is patient, and who is willing to carefully unfold the steps that you need to take in order to start making progress again.

Make sure you find someone who has a heart that feels like I'm here with you. Number four, to get help. Sometimes you need to ask for it. Don't be afraid to ask for help. Number five, tell yourself looking for help doesn't mean that I'm weak or stupid or dumb. It just means you are a normal human being.

It's okay to ask for help. You need to tell yourself that if you're not, if you find it hard to ask for help because you feel like you shouldn't or that it's too embarrassing. Mm-hmm. Looking for help isn't a sign of weakness. It's an opportunity. And finally, turn this around. Who can you help? That's just a few steps behind you.

It will solidify what you already know in English today.

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 My friend, are you struggling right now with your CELPIP prep? Does it feel like you're lost and everyone around you knows what they're doing? Except you don't be afraid to ask for help, and if you don't have someone to ask, um, hello, I'm here. And I'm not even waiting for you to ask for help. I'm inviting you to come and work with me.

I'm an experienced English teacher and certified CELPIP trainer, and I can help you prepare for your exam. I. So if you're ready to stop feeling overwhelmed with what to study next for the CELPIP exam, and if you're ready to get friendly support and encouragement when you are having a hard time, then today is the day for you to connect with me.

I want to work with you, just go to www.celpipsuccess.com/listener and you'll get a 25% discount when you join the CELPIP Success School. I'll put a link for that in my show notes, but that link again is celpipsuccess.com/listener, and you will get a 25% discount. The CELPIP Success School combines weekly assignments that you can do on your own with unlimited support from me, as well as weekly live coaching calls.

Let's work together and conquer the CELPIP exam.

Go to celpipsuccess.com/listener. Thank you for listening to today's episode, and I'll see you next Tuesday.